Saturday, 5 March 2016

Thoughts We've All Had When We're Drunk

I've been tipsy/drunk a fair amount of times... some times it's great, other times it's not *flashbacks to puking on the side of the curb in Covent Garden*... so I thought I would share with you some thoughts that I have when I'm drunk... well, at least the thoughts that I can remember haha! 
1. Happy Hour... what could go wrong?!
2. These cocktails are not working their magic... Tequila time *BAD IDEA*...

3. I can 1000% dance! 
4. I definitely need to chat up that toothless sex god over there! You then get to that point in the night where you 'think' (being the key word) you're the best flirt to ever exist; and when drunk... ANYONE is your type... yep, that's right, even the Jeremy Kyle reject standing at the bar! 
5. Right, time for a toilet break... I can do this! In which you have a very deep conversation with the toilet attendant... I mean, you're basically BFFs right?! 
6. How do I do this toilet thing again?! When you finally end your conversation... you make your way to the toilet. I don't think I really need to explain this, but all I'm going to say is this is the place where you find our how drunk you really are! If you know you know ... Going to the toilet feels like an obstacle on Jungle Run!
7. I wonder if anyone has messaged me?! ... Oh, no one has... I guess I better remind them to message then!
8. Have I told *Insert guy/girl you've been obsessing over* how much I love them? I better do that now, just in case I haven't done it! In which you will immediately regret... 
10. I should probably start making my way home... if that's possible... I mean, of course I can walk to the station...
11. "Bacon... Bacon... I need Bacon..." (Yes, Katie I did just quote you)... As soon as you get home you just need all the foods.... ALL THE FOODSSSSS
12. Time for bed... Is the room spinning... is this me dying... am I going to die... *panic panic panic... pass out*
The next morning...
13. FUCK. 
I hope you liked this post! 
I'm sure you can all relate to this post... if you can't then TELL ME YOUR SECRET!
Can you relate?